Schu Dyes His Hair
by Idimmu
Summary: Schu wakes up...to his worst nightmare! What has happened to his hair?! One of two parts. Shounen-Ai warning if that's not your cup of tea.


Schu Dyes His Hair...  
  
One morning in the place where all the Schwartz guys live, I guess you could call it an apartment if you'd like... Anyways, on this morning, Schuldich woke up after a very nice dream. It involved Crawford, black- silk sheets, with the floor covered in the clothes they *had* been wearing... To tell the truth, it was quite similar to what had actually happened the night before.  
  
He rolled over to snuggle up to the body that had been there the night before. Finding nothing there, he sleepily rose his head and glanced around the room. "Bradley!" Nobody replied, so he half shrunk back under the covers. "Crawford! Where the hell are you?! I need my morning sex!"  
  
Nagi, who just happened to be passing by the room at the time, opened the door and peered in. He was greeted by the sight of Schuldich's long limbs impossibly tangled in the sheets of his bed. "Crawford went out a while ago, besides, it doesn't count as morning sex if it's one o'clock in the afternoon." His eyes then noticed Schuldich's hair, "Umm, Schuldich? What's wrong with your hair?"  
  
At this, Schuldich bolted out of bed and ran to the nearest mirror, not caring that his boxers were hanging off of the floor lamp across the room from his bed, therefore leaving him clothesless. He carefully studied his precious hair in the mirror, it appeared to have lost most of its red colour, and it was now a dirty-blond colour, with random streaks of red scattered around his head. "Nagi, watch Farferello, I gotta go get my hair dyed back. There's no way in hell I will be seen with this hideous hair!" He began to get dressed quickly, before being interrupted by Nagi's voice.  
  
"One: There's no money in the house, it's all in Crawford's bank account. Two: Crawford said you have to stay here until he get's back."  
  
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!!!" Schuldich then thought to himself for a moment, after the profanity laden exclamation. "Nagi, what do we have in the apartment that's red?"  
  
"Ah...blood, strawberries, ketchup, ah..."  
  
"Wait a sec! Did you say 'ketchup'?'  
  
"Yeeesss..."  
  
"Hmm... I can work with that... yes, that's it! I'll dye my hair red with ketchup!"  
  
Ten Minutes Later...  
  
Nagi looked on in confusion as Schuldich hung his head over the kitchen sink, pouring ketchup over his damp hair. "Umm, Schuldich, do you know how, ...I mean, is it even possible to dye your hair with ketchup?"  
  
"You can dye your hair with Kool-Aid, so of course it's possible with ketchup. All you have to do is put it on, then leave it for an hour, then brush your hair with a fork to get rid of excess colourant." He stated matter-of-factly.  
  
"Oh, all right then..." Nagi left the room after stating this, to go make sure they had an extra straitjacket he could put on Schuldich if necessary.  
  
'It was a good thing that Nagi saw my hair this morning, or else I might've left the house mortifiengly ugly.' Schuldich thought to himself as he applied the last of the necessary ketchup to his hair. "Now, to let it set for an hour." He walked over to the stove and set the timer for one hour, then left to go watch TV in the living room.  
  
Half an Hour Later...  
  
Nagi walked by the couch Schuldich sat on, heading in the direction of the front door. "Where are you going chibi?"  
  
Nagi suddenly looked very nervous, and hastily blocked his mind from the inevitable mind prod that Schuldich was bound to do. "Ah, just out. Crawford said that I could go out once I finished work and homework. You should probably check on Farferello soon, too. He's a little too quiet down there.  
  
Schuldich simply nodded in consent/agreement, then said, "I'll check on the psycho when my hair's done. And when is Bradley coming back?" Pouting slightly as he said the last part.  
  
"He'll be back in about an hour" Nagi stated as he touched his hand to the door handle to open it.  
  
"Have fun with your boyfriend, Nagi-kins..." Schuldich's chuckle followed the shocked and embarassed boy out the door into the street.  
  
Another Half Hour Later...  
  
Schuldich was startled from his Pokemon rerun when the timer on the kitchen stove went off. He shut off the TV, and walkedto the kitchen to turn off the timer. Once off, he went to the cutlery drawer, which, (un)surprisingly, was devoid of knives. He grabbed a fork, then proceeded to brush his hair over the sink, rinsing the residue off the fork every minute or so. After ten minutes, he declared it complete. Taking a small lock between his fingers once he had put the fork down, he raised the peice of hair to his nose and sniffed it. 'Still smells like ketchup, but at least it's the right colour now,' he thought to himself, before remembering that he had to go check up on Farferello.  
  
  
  
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There's the first half, the second half will probably be up within the week. 


End file.
